5 Myths and Fact About Selective Mutism

My daughter, Lucy, was diagnosed with Selective Mutism at age 4. Since then, there have been a lot of questions or misconceptions about this disorder.

Here are 5 facts and myths from the Child Mind Institute and how it relates to Lucy's story.

1. I did not know this was a common misconception until I went through parent training at SM camp. I was mortified that people may think this as there is absolutely no trauma or abuse in Lucy’s life. However, what I learned going through this training is that I may have been undiagnosed with SM. I wholeheartedly believe that this is genetic because this was also me as a child who was just labeled as “very shy”.

2. I can see how this can be a common misconception as the behaviors are similar. Lucy displays all these traits when she is experiencing anxiety, however they completely disappear when she is not. That is the major difference between SM and ASD.

3. Yes, they can grow out of it (I am proof) but not without consequences. I feel I missed out on a lot of experiences and social development because of my anxiety, and I have seen Lucy miss out on some too even as we were working to overcome it. Prior to diagnosis and treatment, she didn’t make a whole lot of friends and wasn’t invited to parties or playdates. Her anxiety has also kept her from some school events. There are major downsides to not seeking help and treatment as early as possible.

4. Prior to diagnosis and treatment, it’s easy to think Lucy had speech and learning delays because the teachers could not properly evaluate her. These children, Lucy included, are usually right on track with their peers in regard to speech and learning - they just need help to be able to show that sometimes.

5. Ask Lucy if she wants to have SM and she will tell you she absolutely does not. No child wants to be paralyzed in fear. Many times, Lucy has expressed her wishes to be “a talking kid” all the time. The ability to use their voice is uncontrollable in certain situations, which is why I sort of prefer the term “situational mutism” as it takes this misconception of choice out of it.

Selective Mutism is a very real and very debilitating disorder. Some people are even worried to get help for their child due to the misconceptions about what causes SM. My hope is to continue to bring awareness to this disorder so more children (and adults) can get the help they need.

For more information about Selective Mutism, and resources to find help, visit the Child Mind Institute Website.